Nostrils flare scenting time and

probabilities; mouth

waters anticipating

the fun of the right moment.

I went to have brunch with my son’s family this morning.  Not far after I merged onto the interstate highway I saw a huge blinking yellow arrow pointing to the right.  Roadwork ahead.  As I got to the work site, the Illinois Department of Transportation had helpfully placed a sign to explain the narrowing of traffic lanes: WEEKEND LANE CLOSURES – speed limit 45 MPH strictly enforced; $345 fine.  As I passed the barricaded worksite, no work was taking place.  How kind of IDOT, I thought, to provide practice in proper work zone driving etiquette at the very beginning of the peak road repair season.

But then it also seemed to me to be perfectly fitting for my weekend so far.

I have applied for a job, and I am waiting to see if I get a call for a job interview.  I’m led to believe that the company looked over applicant resumes last week.  So as we got to the weekend with no expectation of a phone call, I have found myself putting much, but not all, of my anticipation aside until Monday.  Oddly enough the part of the anticipation that I was not able to put aside so easily was the “What if they don’t call?” anxiety.  You know.  “What if they don’t call on Monday?!!!”  As though somehow Monday was the last day when Human Resources could be making job interview appointments for such a vital new position.  It is the loss aversion element of seeking something that one considers really, really important.

Jonah Lehrer has an excellent summary of the interaction between the emotional gut mind and the rational mind.  In my current case, given too much time between the point when one begins a decision making process and the point when one can finally make and implement a decision, both my gut mind and my rational mind go a bit berserk.   Here is Lehrer’s sage advice: “Why is thinking about thinking so important?  First, it helps us steer clear of stupid errors.  You can’t avoid loss aversion unless you know that the mind treats losses differently than gains.  And you’ll probably think too much about buying a house unless you know that such a strategy will lead you to buy the wrong property.  The mind is full of flaws, but they can be outsmarted.”  [Lehrer, Jonah.  How We Decide.  Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.  2009.  Page 250.]

Which brings me to two good refresher lessons life has given me with this job opportunity experience.  How kind of life to provide two good practice experiences in the proper handling of job hunting expectations.  Both refreshers relate to meditation.

One of these is that no matter how entrained the mind gets, how attached to an expectation, there will come a point when the nonattached observer self recognizes that the mind has been hijacked by that attachment.  And right after that, one again has a point of choice.  I can continue to wallow in this attachment, or I can step back from it.  I think this is one practical application of what Lehrer is saying about why it is important to know about the thinking process and the ability to outsmart the flaws inherent in human thinking. 

Now I must admit I have wondered today why my own personal observer self took so long to  pull me up short and to whisper “Get a grip” into my ear.  Maybe it was his annual vacation week.  Well, at least life is always happy to provide new learning opportunities for people like me.

The second refresher lesson is that if one is going to blast off all gung ho – “Warp nine, Mr. Data.  Make it so!” – on gripping adventures such as applying for the ideal job, then one had better be prepared to enjoy all aspects of the adventure.  That includes the entrancing emotional ride while surfing the probability waves of the adventure.  “What if HR doesn’t call on Tuesday either?!!!  How kind of HR to prolong the waiting.  Good practice for next weekend.”

And as for my nonattached observer self, I’m deducting at least two days from his annual vacation allotment.